Role Model

"A Person whose behavior, example, or success is or can be emulated by others, especially younger people."  By Definition at Dictionary.com

The words Role Model are used very often and many people still do not know what this means. A role model is someone that is to be emulated or someone for people to inspire to be like. Each day as people we go out into society and we have people watching our behavior. I want to be an example to younger people as well as older people by displaying great character and a respectful demeanor when dealing with others. We should all be trying to paint a legacy of ourselves in a positive light for younger generations to build on. Whether we embrace our Role Model status or we choose to ignore it, either way we will be setting an example for others to emulate.

"Each of us, famous or infamous, is a role model for somebody, and if we aren't, we should behave as though we are, cheerful, kind, loving, courteous. Because you can be sure someone is watching and taking deliberate and diligent notes."

-Maya Angelou

The 4 letter word

Is the word Love used too loosely or not enough at all?  It's a hard question to answer since we as people do not say the word nearly enough to the people who deserve it.  How many people do you think heard that word enough growing up, and if they heard it more would they be different people?  When I was growing up, I only told girlfriends that I loved them and never told my family because I just assumed  since they were family that they knew I did.  Was it because I was afraid to tell them?  Alternatively, was it just because I didn't know how since it was never expressed to me?  I think we as people in this day should express Love to our Family, Friends, and most of all our Children a lot more.  I hear people all the time claim how they don't use the word Hate since it is a strong word.  However, if Love is the opposite of Hate and the word hate is so strong, Why don't we say Love because it's a strong word?  I try to make it a point as a parent to tell my son that I Love him everyday so that he doesn't have to assume.  As a good son I try to tell my parents when I can because they should know as well.  Fathers we should make sure that  we tell our Daughters all the time so that they don't jump in bed with someone just because he was the first man to say he loves her.  Let's not let our sons grow up not knowing how to tell people how he feels because his father was too macho to do so.  The word Love is a very powerful word, and I think we should use the word more freely when speaking to the people who matter most in our heart. 

Single Parent Epidemic

Sadly, more and more children are growing up with only one parent in the home. Often times that single parent is their mother. Statistics show that 67% of African American children in the United States are growing up in a single parent household, and two thirds of those homes have a African American woman providing for her family all alone. This is an alarming epidemic. When compared to Non Hispanic White families in the United States whose children are growing up in single parent households at a 24% rate you can see the lack of fathers in the black community is a huge problem. The quality time that children are missing out on with their fathers is priceless, and as fathers we never get that time back. The single mothers out thre do an outstanding job raising their children and should be commended for all that they do. Men, we must do better for our children. We cannot continue to think its OK to not be there and leave the job of both father and mother to one person. The joy you can receive from eating dinner with your children, playing catch with your son, or having a tea party with your daughter is limitless. 


Single Parent Stats by Race - Data provided by National Kids Count Program

United States
Non-Hispanic White	24%
Black or African American	67%
American Indian	53%
Asian and Pacific Islander	16%
Hispanic or Latino	40%
Total	34%

Step it up for our kids

Often I ask myself if I have what it takes to be a good father.  I answer myself. No, because I believe I have what it takes to be a great Father.  It's important to me that I give my son all the love I received plus more since you can never give enough love.  People ask me all the time how does it feel to be a Dad, and I tell them all the time Great.  And all for the same reason, nobody has ever made my day like seeing the smile on his face.  It's hard to find genuine love like that, so it's difficult for me to understand how so many parents could not want to see their kids happy. Alternatively, on the other hand, not want to see their kids at all, it hurts to see how kid's struggle without a solid foundation to grow with.  It's good to know that there are great teachers out there that take the time to listen to their kids like a parent would, since some of those kids don't have one to go home to.  Some parents get too wrapped up in trying to relive their youth or having their own lives they forget that they are responsible for molding someone's life.
It goes without saying that kids can't do it on their own, and it is not the Teachers' responsibility to raise your child it's up to you.
Billy Ray Cyrus was put on record for saying that he blames the Hannah Montana show for turning his daughter into a rogue teen and practically a loose cannon.  However, isn't that the duty of the parent to raise the child? Isn't it up to him to teach his daughter right from wrong? As he was quoting this it had been several months, since she has been caught on video footage smoking Weed out of a bong, and he hadn't spoken to her about it since.  Where is the parenting in that?  Be responsible and make sure that your kid does not cause unnecessary harm to herself, and you have to watch her fail, be a Great Father not a good one. 
With that being said that's just one example how parenting is getting away from its essence.  I know some people that won't say a curse word to this day in front of their parents just out of respect that they have for them.  Let's teach our kids to be better than us, let's teach them how to be Great people not just good one.

Fiction or Non-Fiction

Have you ever met someone that tried to hold themselves completely different then from what they really are?  Why is it that people feel that they need to pretend to be something they are not from Hustlers, to Pimps, and Thugs when in reality they could be far from that.  Is it important to portray yourself as someone who has struggled in life when all along you were brought up with a silver spoon?  It hard to believe that our society promotes wealth the way it does however so many people want to act as if they are running from it.  Is this blamed on parents not reaching their kids and getting them to understand the differences in life between struggling and well off?  Is it necessary for people to act like they are from one part of town when they were really raised in another?  

When I was growing up nobody was proud of being from the hood, we looked at the people living in the hills as inspiration and motivation to achieve greater.  Did that die with the emergence of all these social network sites that wants you to flaunt your lifestyle or from the all of the gangster rappers that tell our children that it’s ok to be hood?  Our people will never break the perception of being ghetto until we begin to want to move on from it.

Communication

This word is so important in today's world. Men, we have to start communicating better. We need to really understand how best we communicate with others and also help our spouses and children develop this vital skill as well. I found myself upset that my spouse hadn't learned how to better understand, and "deal" with me after all the time we have been together. Then I thought to myself how well have I learned to "deal" with her after this time. So, I decided to take a different approach in communicating with my wife and rest assure it worked. Men, we have to learn to be better communicators as well as listeners. You will reap great benefits and you will enrich the lives of those you come in contact with.

Positive Reinforcement

You are only as good as your weakest link its something that a lot of people should keep in mind.  Surround yourself with positive people and you will notice that you can achieve so much more.  So many people keep negative people in there circles and tend to always have negative outcomes.  Most of the people go to jail because at some point they got involved with a person that led them down a negative path.  It’s important that we teach our kids how to avoid such negative personalities.  The earlier they can be influenced by positive people, the earlier their positive path will be drawn.  Positive reinforcement is the stepping stone to a positive lifestyle it’s so important to give it to your children to help with self confidence.  Remember the more positive people you have in your life, the more likely it is for you to reach that goal.  Instill it in your kids or motivate your friends to stay positive and motivated so that everyone can reach a higher level.

Perception is Everything

With the NBA All-Star weekend going on in L.A a lot of you will descend upon L.A with not a care in the world.  A couple things that you should weary of are Perception.  And although many of you do not think that perception matters but it does very much so.  Be careful how you carry yourself in and around others because anyone can believe your one way when your really not.  For Example a woman acting flirty and loose will automatically be perceived as a woman that will have sex with any man that's willing and a lot of the time that could be so far from the case.  Also a Man with Gold teeth that says the word Nigga more times than he could remember will be perceived as a thug or a trouble maker.  Don't give people the opportunity to perceive you as something your not before they get a chance to know you.  Be mindful of the way you carry yourself in certain situations since actions speak louder than words.  A lot of people will be talk to wrong because of the way they are perceived and wonder if they deserved that type of reaction.  They probably did not deserve it but perception is everything.

Leave Mike Vick Alone!

I am extremely tired of people taking shots at Mike Vick. First, I want to say I by no means condone Vick's behavior toward dogs or any animals for that matter. What Mike did was wrong and he deserved to be punished. Now, here we are the man has served two years in prison, done hours and hours of community service, he has showed contrition, and has not gotten into anymore trouble. He has earned a position on the NFL's Philadelphia Eagles as their starting Quarterback. He earned the NFL's comeback player of the year award as well as being the Pro Bowl starter. These accomplishments should be praised as showing when you make a mistake and hit rock bottom you can rise again through hard work and belief in God. So, when people such as Mark Buehrle of the Chicago White Sox comes out and says he was hoping Mike Vick would get hurt during the season, and Tucker Carlson of FOX News says Vick "should've been executed"  that really upsets me. There are people earning a living that have done far worse things and Vick has earned his right to work and repair his image. I hope his story serves as an example to others that the way you live your life behind closed doors is just as important as your life in front of others.

Congratulations Bill Russell

Congrats To Bill Russell for winning the Presidential Medal of Freedom its the highest honor given to a Civilian. Perhaps the greatest winner in sports history winning 11 NBA championships. Russell has been a great ambassador for Black Men. Its good to see former Athletes give back to their community inspiring other Athletes to give to the people who supported them on their way to stardom.  Athletes have to realize that there are millions of kids looking to be like them when they model themselves.  It was Athletes like Bill Russell that shaped a lot of great Athletes and inspired them to be great.  Its important that Men understand that we shape the way younger men carry themselves.  Let's learn from Bill Russell how to propel ourselves into the upper echelon of good men and set the path before a crop of great men to come.  Shout out to Bill Russell.