Your Child's First Teacher

Children learn a lot from going to school and getting a formal education. But they are also educated by identifying with and imitating their parents. Dr. Benjamin Spock a renowned expert on children and family development called this "incidental learning". Dr. Spock thought that children develop the basic survival tools they need long before they enter the world of formal schooling. I would agree totally with this assumption. As studies show kids do the most learning between the ages of zero and five that's when they are able to absorb an awful lot of information and be able to retain it. Incidental learning takes place throughout a child's life, but a child's first teachers are his parents, and they are his most profound inspiration. Children will attempt to imitate everything that their parents do. The way you talk, walk, and even dress is all being studied closely by your children. Incidental learning at home also influences how a child will perform in school. The best way to instill a love of books in children is to read to them and for them to see their parents enjoying books. Father's, we need to make sure we are a model for what we want our daughter's to look for in a man. A daughter's father shapes the way she views men and the way she feels men should treat her. Make sure we are showing the proper respect for their mother as well as other women we come in contact with so that our daughter's know they deserve and will demand respect from any man they choose to date.
Make sure to treat others as you would like to be treated. Each time you loose your temper or over react to a situation you have a very impressionable child soaking up those behaviors from you. Be the example that you want your child to be through your own positive thoughts and feelings. 
If you want your child's incidental learning to be as beneficial as possible, you should demonstrate whenever possible the type of qualities that you want your child to imitate. Being courteous, loving, adventurous, kind, and an all around good person will inspire our kids to want to do those same things and exhibit these excellent qualities.

Lifes Decisions

One of the things that I told myself that I would always do is not regret any of the decisions that I make.  So that means that every thing that I do I have to learn from so that I can grow as a person.  There are so many people that make rash decisions and regret them later.  It's OK to regret bad decisions in the past, but it's how you grow from that which determines how you learned that lesson.  I was having a conversation with some people about how a lot of women tend to look for men that will take care of them and provide finer things in their lives.  So without any hesitation those women form relationships with those men and then in time have children with those men.  Blinded by monetary and shiny happiness they tend to overlook the fact that this man is not suited to be a father.  By the time they look around this man has left her high and dry taking care of a kid that she wasn't prepared to have.  On the woman side of this situation it's important that women understand who they lay with, you have to know that in the chance that the 2 of you have children will this man be here for his family.  Men have to think that way as well, ask yourself do you think this woman will make an adequate mother and teach your daughter how to be a outstanding woman.  As adults we need to do a better job of understanding what our consequences could be for the things that we do and take responsibility for them.  There are so many young children in the world that has no guidance due to the way their parents handle themselves before they got here.  If the parents have no clue how to respect themselves they will stand no chance in teaching their children to do the same.  We have to make sure that we are teaching our children how to go about conducting themselves in a manner that is acceptable to both their peers and the people that they one day will influence.  So it's always necessary for us as people realize that their is always consequences and things to be learned in life, it's how we go about shaping those decisions that helps become the best people.

Thanks for your support

We have been doing this blog for almost 9 months now and the feedback we have been receiving is awesome.  We appreciate everyone that has ever took the time to read our blog and leave comments.  We started off writing this blog to help inspire people to be better in their daily lives.  We wanted to help promote better fathers since that's what we strive to be.  Growing up without our fathers in our lives helped us understand the importance of being their for our children and teaching them to grow to be great human beings.  It's always been important for us to make an impact on peoples lives no matter how we could.  We understand that our blog is not geared towards everyone, but as long as we can have one person read our blog and say to themselves "That made a lot of sense" and apply it to their daily lives we feel like we accomplished something.  Our goal was to break the stereotype of the average black man and help other black men understand the importance of doing that as well.  To be a great person you have to be able to understand where you came from and where you are going, if you do not know those things you will fail at growing.  Promoting growth is one of the things we try to focus on the most, since growth is a part of everyone's lives no matter the age, color, or gender.  We went from blogging everyday to just a couple days a week in order to put out the best possible blogs we could.  Simply because we felt our blogs should be quality over quantity, so we apologize to the people who looked forward to reading everyday. As a result of your support we have continued to put out the best and most thought provoking content that we come across. We have not added any ads on our blog in an attempt to make sure our message does not get cluttered with any outside influences. We want the focus to strictly be on the quality of the information and nothing else.  We never want to come off as experts in the advice that we give, however a lot of the topics that we touch are always based off experience.  So this blog was just a way of saying Thank You to our faithful readers and that helping others motivates us to want to keep it up.  So if you keep reading we will keep putting out great advice and sound topics.

Believe in Yourself

"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt

"Whether you think you can or think you can't, you are right" - Henry Ford

There may be days where you get up in the morning and things aren't the way you hoped they would be...there will be challenges to face and changes to make in life. That's when you have to tell yourself that things will get better. People will disappoint you, they may let you down in one way or another, but those are the times when you must remind yourself to trust your own judgments and to keep your life focused on believing in yourself and all that you are capable of.
We must remember that the only opinion that really matters to us is our own opinion. Put aside the opinions of others, do not allow anyone else's opinion to negatively affect your view of yourself. Speak up for yourself at work, at school. or at home. This will build confidence in your own voice and opinion. Do not be afraid to try new things. Sometimes a small accomplishment can go a long way to help build a strong sense of self worth, and can help you believe in yourself  the next time you are faced with a challenge or goal. Take on challenges with a positive attitude. Believe that you will be able to meet this challenge and make it through. Whatever goal you set for yourself believe that you will accomplish this goal and work hard towards the finish.  After accomplishing goals and meeting challenges you begin to feel really good about yourself. Your confidence rises and your belief in yourself grows.  Believing that you can do anything is what makes us as people so unique.  It seems a lot of the time we find ways not to believe in ourselves and what we are capable of becoming so we tend to not go for our goals.  We have to always remember even if you do not believe in yourself there is somebody that does.
We are all human and there will be times when we aren't able to accomplish a goal or meet a challenge. These are times where we must have that extra resolve to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and do better the next time. Whatever happens in life you must continue to believe in your abilities and strengths, stay positive, and things will more often than not turn out in your favor.

Successful Families

The right priorities are one of the most important aspects of successful families. It is very important for each parent to put family needs ahead of their own selfish needs, ahead of work, friends and possessions. Both parents need to be willing to sacrifice their time and effort for the interest of the family. These things are highly important in building a successful family life. Taking the time to go over your child's homework, attending their games or recitals are all vital in showing that you care and are committed to making your family successful.
The one institution in life that will always work if you put in the effort is the family. No matter what happens if you are fully committed and have shown love to your family it will be successful it's just that simple. Sometimes families break up even when both parents have done all they can to make it work. That does not mean the family will not be successful. Continue to show that love and respect for your spouse and you can still have a very successful family life. Lee Iacocca one of the most successful business people in the world, admits "The only rock I know that stays steady, the only institution I know that works, is the family." This coming from a guy that spent 2 million dollars on gold-plated faucets. So he was no doubt "successful" at business but he failed at family and when it is all said and done your family success is what outlasts any of your secular success.
Being successful at family is different for all of us. Our ideas of a successful family differ, but we all want our children to succeed. The most important part is to do your best. Put the needs of your family first, love them unconditionally, and respect your spouse. These are the basis of each successful family.