How much is too much?

As people do we ever know when too much, is too much?  Just this past weekend the oil companies went to Capitol Hill to speak to congress about losing 3 billion of their 7 billion in subsidies to help our country with its deficit.  You would think it would be unreasonable to the oil companies by looking at that number, but the truth is the big five oil companies received $34 Billion dollars in it's first quarter not counting the subsidies.  Also as we speak we are almost 2 months in to an NFL lockout that is a debate on how to split 9 billion dollars in profits between owners and players.  In this case both parties have legitimate arguments on why their party should receive the bulk of the profits, but in any case no of this would be possible if it was not for the fans who pay for this the most since they pay the money that they are arguing over.  At some point it has to become apparent to both the NFL and the oil companies that a lot of their profits and earnings comes from the pockets of the consumer.  There has got to be a way for people to come to a mutual agreement when so many parties could be effected by the issues that these organizations go through.  One of the best things we can do as people is to give to the less fortunate.  Why is that we have these situations, but yet they're cutting teachers all throughout the country because they can afford to pay teachers salaries?  They say that $1 Billion dollars could pay for the salaries of 18,000 teachers earning $55,000 a year, as well as pay 251,000 pell grants for aspiring college students.  We need to look further than our own greed sometimes to understand the bigger picture.  In these hard financial times we need to be trying to help as many people out as possible and erase the greed.  Is it so hard to help people that need it as opposed to taken more than you need? At what point do you feel like you have more than enough money to take care of the things that's most important?  They say money is the root of all evil, and in these days you can understand why.  Lets work as people to make the world better for everyone to insure that everyone gets a piece.

Most Fathers aren't Happy...Are You?

An article in the New Yorker last year said, "Most people assume that parenting will make them happier. Yet a wide variety of academic research shows this is not true." The article goes on to say that children invariably reduce marital satisfaction, and the more children you have the less happy you are. I was actually a bit shocked to see that overall parents were less happy than there childless adult counterparts. As I looked into the issue further I realized these parents that were less happy weren't looking at happiness from their kids standpoint, rather looking at fulfilling their own desires.
When I became a parent my happiness and my satisfaction was not my main concern anymore. I had a living, breathing human being that I was lucky enough to be put in charge of. I take that job very seriously and I measure my happiness based on how they are feeling. I don't think I could be happy if they are sad, those two things do not go together in my book. As parents we have to do a whole lot of sacrificing to have a happy family. Instead of watching the game, we have to take the kids to practice, or instead of relaxing on the weekend we have to be a kid's birthday party with our children. As much as these things may seem like a burden we should be happy to spend this quality time with our kids. Being there to support them at their events instills confidence and a lasting bond. They will always remember that you are there for them in whatever path they choose.
When I think about it, I couldn't imagine my life without the joy my kids bring to it. There are definitely hardships and it's tough worrying about their safety, but the joy of watching them perform on stage, on a field, in the classroom, or just in your living room is enough to make it all worth it. Have a great Memorial Day weekend!

Dajs Daily will be observing the holiday on Monday May 30th, and we will have the positivity back for you bright and early on Tuesday May 31st.

Where's the good music?

What's going on with music these days?  It seems like no matter where we turn there's another rapper coming out that doesn't carry any substance.  A majority of the music being released is by men deciding they want to be a rapper because of the women and fast cars.  Shouldn't there be more to making music than just the material things.  Back when I was growing up most rappers had a purpose on why they were making music.  In the 90's we had rappers that were making music to speak for the people that could not.  It's important that we get back to music that promotes wellness and encourages people that don't want to be rappers to be better people and strive for their goals.  I know it can't be done by every artist on every song, but it should be songs that empowers people to do better. A study by the Black Youth Project showed a majority of youth think rap has too many violent images. In a poll of  black Americans by the Associated Press and AOL-Black Voices in 2006, 50% of respondents said hip-hop was a negative force in American Society. How sad to see how quickly rap and hip-hop has turned so negative.
I don’t think all rap/hip-hop music is bad. But there are definitely some cancerous elements within it. One of the rappers I feel that is doing the best at being real and saying something meaningful is Kanye West.  Although all of his music isn't 100% positive, it does paint a picture about issues our communities are going through.  Some of the most prolific artist have become huge due to their ability to keep music good.  Music touches your soul and has the ability to change your whole attitude without it a lot of people would not be the people that they are.  So for any artist you may know or if you are an artist yourself, remember good music will sound good to the ear, but great music will fill the soul.  Try to make music more than just about the money you make, but the people you touch.

Super Dad

Whenever actor George Reeves the actor who played Superman in the 1950's would make a public appearance in his Superman costume, kids would come up and kick him in the shins, punch him in the back and, one time, a child pointed a loaded .45 at him. They figured since he was the "man of steel", he couldn't be hurt.
Dads, do you try to be Superman to your kids? Never showing sensitivity and vulnerability? Do we act like we are ok even when we are going through tough times? True masculinity is letting your children know that, at times, you struggle with sorrow, anxiety, anger and depression. But you work through these things. As men most of us were taught to not show very much emotion, not to cry or be sensitive in front of others. We hide our vulnerabilities and we pretend we aren't scared of anything and nothing bothers us. Its OK to show emotion as a man. Some men are sensitive, others are not, that doesn't make you less of a man in any way we need to know that.
Also, it is ok to show our kids some of that vulnerability. I know as fathers we want to be our child's superman and their hero as well. Part of doing that is showing them that at times everything doesn't go their way and you will be frustrated and it's how you deal with those tough times that show what we are really made of.
Research has demonstrated, time and again, that children especially teens look to their parents for guidance regarding every important aspect of their lives. Drugs, sex, appropriate conduct at school, friends, money you name it they want to hear from us. So in turn we owe it to them to be open and honest with them, not to avoid situations that are unpleasant, cause if we do they will seek advice from somewhere else. Teaching your children by example how to persevere through pain will make them "super" human beings.

False Prophets

Its been stated "If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything."  This is such a true statement which was all recognized on May 21st the day after the World was predicted to end.  It's crazy how so many people believed one little old man could predict that it would all come to an end.  So many people spent their life savings since they believed it would be their last opportunity to do anything significant.  One man went as far as spending his life savings, a whopping $140,000 just to pay for billboards saying that it would all come to an end on May 20th 2011.  The man that came up with this theory goes by the name of Harold Camping, an 89 year old self proclaimed Bible Scholar out of Alameda County.  Camping has also predicted that the world would end before back in 1994, which most of you know by now was also wrong.  So that brings us to the topic at hand.  How could someone continue to listen and follow the word of a man that has been so wrong in a matter that is so important?  First it's almost impossible to believe in Science and Faith since they contradict each other.  Harold Camping used a mathematical formula in order to come up with the date for his projected end of the world.  Also it was stated in the bible that God didn't let anyone know when the last day of earth would occur, not even the Angels.  So if you follow the Bible faithfully like most God fearing people do, you would have realized that the end of the world claim was off in so many ways.  He's now saying that he miscalculated and that what he should have said was it will end in October. 


    We as people need to realize that even though we have Pastors, Reverends, Deacons, Monks, and Rabbi’s the word of God is up to you to interpret the way you believe.  We can't live our lives waiting for the World to end; we need to live our lives as if the World has just begun.  It's not wise to follow the lead of someone just because you feel as if they may have the answers.  Did you know that a few of Camping’s followers tuned back in to listen to what the Pastor had to say the following monday, even though he was wrong?  At what point do you say enough is enough and find someone that will not fill your mind with hopeless nonsense.  It makes me wonder what else he has gotten them to listen to and believe.  This situation doesn't promote the word of God, but it gives Atheist all over the world more reasons to negatively view people of faith. 

So in the end let's make sure that we are being responsible adults and are making proper decisions on what we listen to and what we fall for.  Make sure that your kids does not become a follower, because following someone else's practices does not lead to better lives unless you are following a life that lives self righteous.  If our kids do not learn to become their own person, then they will follow the lead of anybody that will show them the way.

Never too Late

On Friday Night I was able to go to a San Francisco Giants game with my dad and one of my very best friends. It was a great time. As the game was going on I was thinking about how great it is to have my father in my life. My dad wasn't around very much while I was growing up but as I became a teenager he began to come around a lot more. I have really enjoyed these years having my father in my life. I am not worried about the time he wasn't there I'm just concerned with him being here now.
As I thought about this I wondered about all the fathers that think it may be too late to establish a connection with their child. Some may think that if they abandon them at one point how can they ever make that up. The truth is you cannot make that time up. The time that was missed is gone and what is important is the future. It is never too late to make an attempt to be a part of your child's life. We have all made mistakes, we have all done things we aren't proud of, but we must learn from our mistakes, change our behavior and try to do better in the future.
I am really grateful my father didn't have the attitude that it was too late for us to establish a father/son relationship. Our bond has become so strong over the years, we have both enjoyed getting to know each other and learning from one another. The most important thing in life is to continue to move forward and learn from the past. Don't beat yourself up about past transgressions, work on being a better person each day and you will continue to progress.

Common Controversy

It's not very often you hear a heated debate over poetry, but Bill O'Reilly of Fox News and Jon Stewart of "The Daily Show" did just that. The controversy stems from an invitation given to a rapper by the name of Common  to come to the White House and read poetry. Common was invited by the first lady of the United States Michelle Obama. Upon hearing of his invite to the White House Bill O'Reilly highly criticized the choice of Common based on his belief that Common celebrates violence and cop-killing in his lyrics, and therefore had no place performing at the White House. Jon Stewart mocked Bill O'Reilly's outrage on "The Daily Show" saying "Common was the subject of Fox News Channel's latest exercise in fits of hissy."
The part that we find most intriguing is how the artist Bono from the group U2 did a song called "Native Son" which talks about a man that was convicted of killing 2 FBI agents and he was invited to the White House without any question.  This is not to point any blame or to speak badly about that particular President or artist, but isn't this the same thing.  How could they say that President Obama supports cop killings just because he invites an artist who wrote a song about them to the White House for poetry night.  The only known criticism comes from FOX news and Bill O'Reilly.  This is the same man that went on air and said that Jennifer Aniston was promoting teenage pregnancy because she made a remark about women not always needing a man to raise a child.  I know he has the right to speak his mind, but how does he justify that?  Is this what our country really wants to hear? Certainly not. Its plain to see that this type of thinking is flawed, and baseless.
One thing that I felt is important to mention is the fact that Common is being judged simply because he has an opinion on something. He never said that killing cops is ok, he never condoned that type of behavior, he simply felt that someone that was accused of killing a cop was indeed innocent. Malcolm X said if you don't stand for something you will fall for anything, and I truly believe that and applaud Common for standing up for what he believes in.
 Bill O'Reilly debates Jon Stewart

Using Kind Words

We have all heard the saying as a child sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me. Turns out as we become adults we realize that is not entirely true. Words are very powerful, and can actually cause broken bones. The words that we use when speaking to our kids, our spouses, or our friends even are very important. We want to use words that are good for building up each other. We don't want to be condescending to our spouses, or a tyrant to our kids, we want to use words that encourage rather than words that discourage.
A lot of times its not what you say it's how you say it. I have heard that from different people pretty often. I know we all have had those moments where someone has said something that may not have been all that bad, but the way they said it made you angry. After you take a second and think about it you then realize that the issue is more about the tone rather than what was said. The key is to take that second and not just react so quickly. Take a deep breath answer with mildness and you will see that the issue can be quickly resolved without additional conflict.
As I stated in the first paragraph words can be powerful enough to break bones. Words can also be powerful enough to heal bones as well. Kind words can solve problems, it can also turn away rage. The words we use have a profound impact on those we come in contact with. We want to leave a lasting good impression on our families and friends by using speech that is positive and good for building each other up.

Protection is Key

One of the most important things these days for our youth to learn about and keep in mind is the practice of safe sex.  So many of our youth today are becoming teenage parents, or victims of STD's.  It's a plaguing epidemic that needs to be look into a little more often.  I was asked the other day did I have any classes while growing up for Sex Ed.  When I thought about it, I knew I never had any in High School or Junior High, but I did in Elementary.  With the way life is now you would assume that there is more education out there to help teens with understanding this better.  There should be classes assisting younger women on how to make sure they are protected and how to say No to sexual temptation.  In elementary there is not a overwhelming amount of kids thinking about sex so the class then is a little irrelevant.  We should be focusing on the kids that intrigued by sex more the actual teens and young adults.  There are so many kids out there having sex at a young age, because they feel like they need to in order to help their social status.  The worst part about that is most of them are not aware on how to use protection properly or at all.  That's where the schools as well as parents need to get involved.  Let's promote classes that teach these things throughout the school year not just for 1 hour out of the day.  Sometimes curricular learning isn't just enough for teens and young adults they need life training as well. We need to make sure that our teens realize that there is nothing glamorous about becoming a teen parent.  They need to understand that will change the outcome of their lives drastically.  Teens get so caught up in the act of actually having sex that they forget to think about consequences. 

We have to let them know that teen pregnancy is the least of their worries.  Teens don't realize how easy it is to catch an STD, most of which is transmitted by someone who never know they have one.  1 out of 4 people in the world have an STD and don't know it, and 1 out of 5 people in the U.S has an STD.  With these numbers it's easy to understand how diseases could spread so fast.  It's important that we help our teens understand what they can contract and how it could affect their lives.  Make sure that if they are sexually active, that they are tested regularly.  I think one of the worst things that teens and young adults say is "They looked clean."  What they don't realize is that most STD's are not noticeable unless the person is having a attack or a break out.  Let's try to insure that our younger generations are understanding the importance of practicing safer sex.

Blacks and Unemployment

I recently read an article on "Yahoo" News that says the Employment rate for Black Men is at an all time low. The article states that out of all black men over the age of 20, only 56.9% of them have jobs. Compare this to white men who are employed at a 68.1 percent clip and you can see that something is wrong here. Among blacks it's not just the men that are suffering. Just 51.5% of blacks across the board compared to 59.5% of whites are employed the numbers show. That's the lowest rate for blacks since 1984. These employment rates are calculated differently from the top line unemployment rate, which includes only those actively looking for work. What could be causing this record high of unemployment in the black community?
The first thing to consider is the education level of those looking for employment. The schools in the black community for the most part are having trouble giving the proper education children need to be successful. School programs are constantly being cut, teacher pay is a joke, and the people that suffer are our children. Another reason is the disproportionate amount of blacks in the prison system. One of our highest concerns of ours doing this blog is to get our youth to stay out of prison. A lot of our attention is focused on parents being there to teach their kids right from wrong.
The hiring practices of these companies are being called into question as well. Online job listings have been telling applicants that have been unemployed for six months or more will not be considered for employment. The federal government is probing whether such listings illegally discriminate against blacks that are disproportionately likely to among the jobless.
The social and political impact of continued high black unemployment and underemployment could be measured by homelessness, foreclosures, health issues, among other ways. But the most troublesome lingering problem may be the destruction of the dreams of young people. We cannot allow these disparaging statistics to define us. If you are currently looking for a job, stay positive, do not get discouraged and you will be successful in your search for a satisfying job. Take this time to reconnect with your love ones. Spend the extra time in between looking for a job with your family. Most of all be confident in your abilities and the special qualities that you bring to a potential employer.
We all have hardships and losing a job is not an easy one to deal with. One of the nicest co workers I have just informed me he lost his house and has no place to live. He doesn't even know where he will lay his head this very evening, and he actually has a job, how sad these times are for some.  I encourage us all to do the best we can to encourage others, uplift others, and bring a smile to someone's face, you never know what that person may be enduring.